Dang it All
Trials and Travails of a 20-something
Saturday, August 31, 2002

"Forgive your enemies, but never forget their names."
- John F. Kennedy (1917-1963)

Music playing right now: Middlebury Dissipated Eight - Ants Marching

I just got my little Honda Civic 3 or 4 weeks ago. I have recently decided that it needs a good name. I've narrowed it down to 6 choices, that are listed with their respective meanings:
Edgar - Great Spearman
Jenga - One with reddish complexion
Erimentha - Collector of Thoughts, Determined Protector
Gerard - Brave
Gwyneth - Fortunate, blessed
Eudora - Honored gift.

Personally, I'm leaning towards Edgar or Gerard. Dave thinks I should name it something non-personal, such as "the snootchie-bootchie." Any other suggestions? I am currently also trying to decide which church to start frequenting. I have a really cool magnet from St. Michael and All Angels, but I'm not sure that's a good basis on which to pick a place of worship. I guess I should just start trying them out 'til I find one I like. I'm hungry. Adios for now. Thanks for reading, this has been cathartic.

"We have art to save ourselves from the truth."
- Friedrich Nietzsche (1844-1900)

Music playing right now: KISS - Detroit Rock City

Conquered my boredom today. For my past two years at LU, I spent 90% of my weekends at Maryah's house. Being by myself in my room on a Friday night is a totally new sensation. There just wasn't much going on in my room. I think I'm going to have to find more people to hang out with this year. This is a year for making new friends. Ended up watching Supertroopers with Tim B. and then going to see Minority Report with like half my floor. That was a much better movie than I had heard. It might not have been Stephen Spielbergs best movie ever, but it certainly kept my attention. The only thing that really annoyed me about the movie was the fact that they showed the trailer for it with the other previews. Kind of gave away a lot of the movie. I could have done without that.

My life could use some more excitement. It seems like all I do lately is watch movies. I'm reminded of a quote from "Nurse Betty." Renee Zellweger's husband in that movie ridicules her for watching soap operas. I'm paraphrasing, but it's something like "People watch other people's lives all day long because they have no lives of their own." I sometimes feel like I'm living vicariously through characters in movies that I love, wishing I had their life. Maybe I just need to get out more. Or maybe that's the point of movies, to offer the chance to escape reality for a couple of hours. If so, I think I take advantage of that offer a bit too much. You can read all the travel books in the world, but if you never travel yourself, what's the point? Adios for now.

Thursday, August 29, 2002

"Wit is educated insolence."
- Aristotle (384-322 B.C.)

Music playing right now: Hoobastank - Running Away

I just discovered Wired Magazine this summer. What a great magazine. If I had the money, I think I'd subscribe. But for now, I'll content myself with reading the articles they have posted. I just find it amusing the foibles that occur on the web, including ivillage.com letting people read random emails, the fact that the RIAA website was hacked into and got mp3s posted on its homepage, and the news that Umbro named its new leather shoe after the nerve gas that was used to kill Jews in the Holocaust.

I finally got some people to play croquet with me today. Too bad I finished last. It was still fun. I like spending time with other people. It beats a computer monitor any day. Well, depending on the people. Got bored tonight so I wandered around campus with Pat and Phil. We ran into 41 in the middle of serenading the one floor of girls on Thomas. If I was that floor I would be very scared to be in the same building with all of those guys. On their own they are ok, but en masse they are a force to be reckoned with. Wasted Corey's time a bit and talked to Dawn and Amy. Need to find a good coffee house. As far as I know, there aren't any in town. Might have to go to Java Jireh some more this semester. Oh well. Have to do homework. Adios for now.

P.S. (11:17 PM) Just found this. Thought it was interesting. Nice collection of blogs that went south. Check it out for some interesting last words.

"Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former."
- Albert Einstein (1879-1955)

Music playing right now: Weezer - Pink Triangle

Ok, quick poll for all of you out there. Ever catch yourself avoiding stepping on cracks when you walk? Noticed myself doing it today. I had to wonder what I looked like to others out and about. Here I was, making huge steps, then little ones, then really big ones again, all in order to avoid the impact of my foot on a minute gap of concrete. Where does this strange phobia come from? I have long since given up the idea that my mother's back will be broken, and yet the strange activity continues, propelled by an unexplainable urge to avoid those evil ravines in the sidewalk. Any ideas anyone?

I have yet to get into the groove of school. I don't think it has quite sunk in yet that it has started and it's time to buckle down and get to work. There are still too many ideas rattling around in my head and too much energy in my body for school to be here. I constantly feel the need to be doing something, but as of yet there isn't much to do. I need something to spend my time on. Came close to going to Kansas City this weekend, but decided I didn't need to waste the time or the gas. If any of y'all are doing anything exciting, be sure and give me a call and let me know. I'm drowning in this pool of boredom that I have created for myself. I don't want to deliquesce into a stagnant gob of tedium. That's about it. Adios for now.

Wednesday, August 28, 2002

"Success usually comes to those who are too busy to be looking for it"
- Henry David Thoreau (1817-1862)

Music playing right now: Green Day - Macy's Day Parade

Went to my first class of the day today at 7:10. What an awful time of day. Whoever came up with the idea of getting up early should have their face run over by a cheese grater repeatedly. Found out that I have to spend at least 2 hours a week on top of classes in a public school observing. From what I hear from older education students, that's less than before, but it's just one more thing that is going to occupy my time this semester. I also have to do my first homework of the semester tonight. Not quite looking forward to it. Corey told me to stay in his office from 1-3 to answer the phone but I have nothing else to do. Gotta waste my time posting here and looking for good quotes. Should've brought a book. That's it for now. Just trying to keep myself busy. Adios for now.

"It is much more comfortable to be mad and know it, than to be sane and have one's doubts."
- G. B. Burgin

Music playing right now: Puddle of Mudd - She Hates Me

Ug. 6:30 too early for Dan. This semester going to be bad. This 7:10 class is going to kill me. I felt like such a wuss going to bed at 11:30 last night. But then Dave and I talked until 12:30 anyway, so it's not like it did much good. We discussed how strange women are. In the end we came to the conclusion that "girls are scary." Dave did wax poetic at one point though when he compared women to bungee jumping. "It's really scary when you get up to the edge, but as soon as you jump off there is such a rush." Oh well. I think I waste too much time thinking about this stuff. I should just let it work itself out and stop cluttering up my mind with it. Good luck in class today. Adios for now.

Tuesday, August 27, 2002

"Education is a progressive discovery of our own ignorance."
- Will Durant

Music playing right now: Bjork - Violently Happy

Ahhh....the first day of school. The trepidation, the nervousness, the excitement. It's always interesting, no matter how old you are. There's always the same questions. Will this class be really hard? Will I like the teacher? Will there be anyone to sit next to? I think I can say I got through my first day relatively well. I am still alive and breathing and all parts seem to still be functioning.

I attempted to reconcile all of my schedules today. Once again, I think that this will be a very busy year. I'm going to be working as a S.T.A.R. (telecounselor) 4 days a week, working in the YAC office at least 2 afternoons a week, going to YAC meetings Monday nights, and taking 17 hours. Doesn't leave much time for reading, wasting time on the web, or movies.

Speaking of movies, Dave and I watched Detroit Rock City tonight. I love that movie. Watched it at least 4 times this summer. A very good movie about the desire of youth to be independent from parental influence and how so often parents can be pretty clueless. Basically a teen rebellion movie. Everytime I watch a movie lately though, I'm struck by how easy it seems. The guy always gets the girl, the hero always wins, and the bad guy always goes down in flames. Too bad it doesn't always work that way in real life. Enough rambling for tonight, I have a 7:10 class tomorrow. Enjoy your sleep. Adios for now.

Monday, August 26, 2002

"Silence is argument carried out by other means."
- Ernesto"Che"Guevara (1928-1967)

Music playing right now: Live - We Walk in the Dream

For my thoughts tonight, please refer yourself to my first post on Thursday August 22, 2nd paragraph, starting with sentence 4.

"In America, anybody can be president. That's one of the risks you take."
- Adlai Stevenson (1900-1965)

Music playing right now: SR71 - Right Now

Yipppeee!! Dave is back! Finally I have a roommate. Now we can put up our loft. Our floor only lacks one more person to be complete. Hopefully our hallway will be somewhat clear soon too. I'm tired of having to climb over 20 feet of carpet to get out the door. Happy cleaning. Adios for now.

"A witty saying proves nothing."
- Voltaire (1694-1778)

Music playing right now: Powerman 5000 - Nobody's Real

Do you ever find yourself just sitting at your computer staring off into space with a glazed expression on your face?

Yeah, me neither.

Sunday, August 25, 2002

"Every passing minute is another chance to turn it all around."
- Penelope Cruz in "Vanilla Sky"

Music playing right now: OPM - Heaven is a Halfpipe

Just watched Vanilla Sky. Very good movie. It reminded me a lot of "The Game" with Michael Douglas. Pretty much everybody is now back on the floor. There is a flurry of activity happening as people scramble to get up their lofts. I think I'm going to wait until Dave gets back so I can get some help. Hopefully by then the hallway will be somewhat clear too. If we had a fire right now, I think half the people here would be killed because you have to walk throught the hall single file. I think I'm going to finish my movie list. If any of you out there are ever bored and need something to watch, just call me up. I'm always ready to watch a movie or let you borrow one. Adios for now.

"Never mistake motion for action."
- Ernest Hemingway (1899-1961)

Music playing right now: 311 - Track 05 (don't know the song name)

I think I can say with conviction that I accomplished almost nothing today. I went and retrieved a bunch of stuff from our storage unit, but other than that I think that I have pretty much wasted this entire day. I did have one brief moment of near excitement however. I went to the church fair and was extremely dissapointed to see that there was no good free stuff. I did get to see The Limey Brit however.

I also went by the Life challenge booth and noticed that they had a big box full of shirts behind their booth. I tried to persuade one of the more outgoing girls to slip me a shirt so my trip to Solheim wouldn't be entirely wasted. She told me that she couldn't, but that she was a freshman here and she'd meet me at dinner and give me one. I was excited that I had actually accomplished something and validated my trip all the way across campus, but then she never showed up at dinner. How frustrating. I'll have to ask her what happened if I ever see her again. Well, unfortunately that's about all that I did of interest today. Hope your day was more exciting than mine. Adios for now.

Saturday, August 24, 2002

"Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It's the transition that's troublesome."
- Isaac Asimov

Music playing right now: Hot Chocolate - You Sexy Thing

I don't think there is anything quite so relaxing as a hot shower in a Tyler dorm. I would be hard put to find another place where the showerheads put out 6.8 gallons per second and you can direct 4 showerheads on yourself at the same time. Feels very good after sleeping in until 11.

I scared myself twice in the night. I got some stuff out of storage yesterday including my mannequin head. I clamped her to the end of my bed and almost had a heart attack twice in the night when I woke up and saw her staring at me. Think I need to find a less frightening place to place her. That's it for now.

"I don't know why we are here, but I'm pretty sure that it is not in order to enjoy ourselves."
- Ludwig Wittgenstein (1889-1951)

Music playing right now: Belle and Sebastian - Wrong Girl

Tip for all of you people out there: Shaving cream is not the most tasty thing in the world. I do have a good song about it somewhere though by Dr. Demento. Should put get that off of it's cd and put it up here, but I'm too lazy right now. In other matters, what's up with the internet? None of LU's website is working. Oh well, bedtime now. Sweet dreams to all of you out there in neverland. Adios for now.

Friday, August 23, 2002

"If Stupidity got us into this mess, then why can't it get us out?" "
- Will Rogers (1879-1935)

Music playing right now: Prodigy - Voodoo People
Yet another car broken into last night. This sucks. Hopefully this will become a problem that the administration sees we have to deal with. I think I've seen more of Frank Galloway in the past two days than I did all of last year. This is a great school and I love going here, but there are a few things that really need to change. Locking my door everytime I leave is such a pain. But I guess for now it's necessary. I'm just glad I've got an old, tiny car with a crappy stereo in it. I'm not sure anyone will bother to break-in to steal my tape deck. Adios for now.

"Anything that is too stupid to be spoken is sung."
- Voltaire (1694-1778)

Music playing right now: Fuel - Shimmer

What a fun night. Phil and I drove to Dallas in my tiny little car and saw a pretty good concert. Dead Poetic, Embodiment, and Stavesacre were playing at the Trees club. The first two were just ok, but if you like loud music, I would recommend going to see Stavesacre. Met Charles Reiche at the concert by accident. He's a cool guy. He's got 1 credit hour left and then he'll finally graduate after 7 years at LU. I discovered that almost everything is funny at 1:00 in the morning. I was afraid that I'd have a problem staying awake on the drive back, but Phil and I were laughing the whole way back. Also had some good discussions on females and churches. Discussed how I've become a cynic when it comes to the Bible. Not something I'm too happy about. Phil suggested that I go to Church on the Rock, but the adult service, not the youth one. Think I might try it. Lots of fun. Adios for now.

Thursday, August 22, 2002

"Sometimes a scream is better than a thesis."
- Ralph Waldo Emerson (1803-1882)

Music playing right now: Soundgarden - Black Hole Sun

The establisment sucks. That's about all I can say. We found out this morning that two people on our floor had their cars broken into last night. One of them got a really expensive radio and speakers, etc. stolen along with his window broken. The other one just got his radio and his door broken. Neither of them have more than liability insurance, so they're basically screwed. And then Doug W. waltzed down here and told them that they're trying to get new security measures installed, but they're just moving a little slow. Instead, it is vitally important that we make our aluminum buildings look like crap with brick facades. I'm feeling sick. I can't imagine what Ryan and Pat are feeling. This sucks. Adios for now.

"In science one tries to tell people, in such a way as to be understood by everyone, something that no one ever knew before. But in poetry, it's the exact opposite."
- Paul Dirac (1902-1984)

Music playing right now: Metallica - Whiskey in the Jar

My poetic genius strikes again! Actually, I was feeling in a poetic mood tonight, but just couldn't think of anything to write about. So I wrote about that. Definitely not my favorite poem that I've written, but it's ok. Speaking of my poetry, it any of you happen to read masquerade, read it and then read only the capitalized lines. I was proud of that. Took me an extra 10 minutes or so. Anyway, that was it. I was proud of my new poem and I'm sure you're all really excited to read it. Enjoy. Adios for now.

Wednesday, August 21, 2002

"I am not young enough to know everything."
- Oscar Wilde (1854-1900)

Music playing right now: The Refreshments - Banditos

I think I post too much to my blog. Phil and I just got finished watching "What Women Want." Pretty good movie, but frustrating. We both commisserated about how unfair it is that Mel Gibson can read women's minds but we can't. You females are just too confusing. Have you ever considered telling us exactly what you're thinking all the time? It would make it so much easier for us dense male types. That's all I was ranting about. My headache is almost gone. Hopefully it will disappear by morning. Adios for now.

Tuesday, August 20, 2002

"Everything has been figured out, except how to live."
- Jean-Paul Sartre (1905-1980)

Music playing right now: Flaming Lips - Yoshimi Battles The Pink Robots

Life is catching up with me. Jon Edwards just arrived back on our floor with his blushing new bride. I don't think anything can quite make you feel so old as when your friends start getting married. The idea that I could be the one who just had a two-day whirlwind honeymoon and came back to college is unnerving. I just don't feel that old yet. I don't think the fact that I am almost on my own and will soon be forced to fend for myself has ever really sunk in. I am still living in the blissful ignorance of youth, depending on parents and friends to do all the really important stuff. I think that the near future will be a rude wake up call for this poor human being.

The nearness of my maturity scares me on a deep level. I'm not ready for and I'm not sure I want the responsibility yet. I'm still having too much fun. I think that time is running out though. In 10 years or so it will be my kids having the fun times and I will be the one who has to work every day and only gets to have fun on the weekends. I hope with all my heart that it never comes to that. My entire goal in selecting teaching as my major was to avoid that pitfall. I want to enjoy my life to the fullest and hope that life will enjoy me in the same way. Enough deep thoughts for now. I have a headache. Adios for now.

"No Sane man will dance."
- Cicero (106-43 B.C.)

Music playing right now: The Mystic's Dream by Loreena McKennitt

Well, I got up this morning all ready to go help Shawn and Kyle move some carpet. Made my way over to the YAC room just to find nobody else there. Ended up checking my email and found Kyle's voicemail saying that they couldn't find a truck so the whole thing was off. Would have been nice to know that before I got my lazy butt out of bed. The word for today is fettle, meaning 'a condition of fitness or order.' That sounded like the pretty much exact opposite of my life. I've got so many random things going on and not much organization between them. I don't know what I'm going to do when school starts too. Implode, most likely. Speaking of school however, I need to buy my books. Adios for now.

Monday, August 19, 2002

"Don't let it end like this. Tell them I said something."
- last words of Pancho Villa (1877-1923)

Music playing right now: Just a Girl by No Doubt

renascent \rih-NAS-uhnt\, adjective:
Springing or rising again into being; showing renewed vigor.

Saw that this morning when I checked my email and got the word of the day. It describes my feelings pretty well as I start this next semester. My last 2 years here at LU have been great, but have been kind of slow and I didn't put much effort into them at all. I think a big part of that was all the time I spent with Maryah. I spent almost every weekend with her, which made getting to know other people around campus kind of hard. I'm hoping that in the upcoming year I can fix some of that and get to know more people. It kind of sucks breaking up with a girlfriend, but it's amazing how the things you miss are not the things that you would think. I miss the backrubs (my back hurts right now), the hugs, and the times where we just sat and laughed. But now I'm ready to start over. The rest of my life sits before me and beckons and I must continue on.

"While we are postponing, life speeds by."
- Seneca (3BC - 65AD)

"Show me a sane man and I will cure him for you."
- Carl Gustav Jung (1875-1961)

Music playing right now: Bad Reputation by Joan Jett

Life feels much better when you get to rest after a busy day. I spent my time today updating the yac website and cleaning up the yac room. Had a good time going to buy stuff for it with Shawn. And I scored some free carpet from Shawn's house. It seems that his parents are redecorating and he happens to have a bunch of carpet on his hands. lucky me. We made plans at our yac training today to snare as many freshman as we can to help put on activities. That should help. There were a few times last year where we could really have used more people helping out. It looks like I'm going to have a lot more work to do this year in YAC than last year. That kind of sucks. Oh well, I'm an education major, it's not like I have anything else to do anyway.

Got a letter this morning in my CPO that says I made it into Mensa. I've been waiting for that letter for a while now. I'm excited. It's great to know that I'm really that smart, but now they want me to pay $49 in annual dues right away. Not sure it's worth it. I think I might try it just for one year though and see if it's worth paying my dues next year.

A big thanks to Eliot for all his help in putting together my blog. It looks a lot better today than it did yesterday. I'm ready for my rooommate to get back and for school to start. I'm afraid this week might move a little slowly. I do get to go play on Lake Cherokee with the people from YAC tomorrow. That should be fun. Unfortunately, I think that means I am going to have to take off my shirt to swim. That is not such a good thing. My pudge has not dissapeared over the summer. I guess we can't have everything though. I have decided that I'm going to start jogging this semester in order to try and work that off. Well, I gotta go. Have to go see Bethany and see how she's doing in her new apartment. Adios for now.

Sunday, August 18, 2002

"The only difference between me and a madman is that I'm not mad."
- Salvador Dali (1904-1989)

Music playing right now: Feel so Numb by Rob Zombie

What a long, boring day. Started out well with the communion service in the morning, but after that was over, there was really nothing left to do. Some more people on the floor showed up today. I think I can say with conviction that I accomplished almost nothing today.

Went to dinner with Phil Morehead. What a cool guy. Kind of quiet to people who don't know him, but he's really a very smart, interesting guy. Went to Monjunis and had some good italian food. Learned all about Phil's summer working in construction. Sounded like he had a much more eventful summer than mine. After dinner, Phil and I came back and watched UHF with Jason Pike. What a funny movie. Michael Richards is hilarious. After the movie it was like 8:00 and I could think of nothing to do, so I made Phil wander around campus with me looking for something. We stopped in MSC-1 and talked to Sam for a while. He's a cool guy, it's too bad he's not going to end up being on our floor this year.

Then we went and explored Thomas Hall. It seems that in their zeal for unlocking everything, they left the 4th floor unlocked so you can go up and check out the attic. What a boring day. Hope tommorow's better. I get to start YAC training. I hope Kyle does a good job as president this year. He doesn't have Shawn's charisma, but he has a great sense of organization and leadership.

Well, here goes nothing. I'm starting out this blog with a bit of insecurity and trepidation. There is always the fear of what others will think when they read your inmost thougts. I'm listening to Blue Monday right now by Orgy. "You'll find it's so hard to find what I need to say." I decided to start one of these after admiring the work of others. Eliot, Bethany, and Andrew and have done wonderful jobs bringing others into their life and expounding on what they're experiencing. Hopefully I can manage just a bit of that candor and truthfulness in my posts. I'm also kind of hoping that putting my thoughts down on paper will help to organize myself, one of my biggest problems. I've always been a person who just kind of skates through life and expects things to fall in place. A lot of times though, I miss out on cool stuff because I just didn't plan ahead. Just got back from the IMPACT retreat last night. Had a good time. I was in the same room with Jeremy Haines. I had no idea that somebody could sleep as much as that man did. He seriously must have slept 16 hours on saturday between the night and his naps. Stayed up Friday night and played euchre with derek (sp?), Moshe, and Stuart Asp. That was fun. Then talked to Kate for a while. She said that she couldn't take all the girly gossip going on in the girls section. Gave me a nice boost when she told me that they were saying good stuff about me. I've been thinking for a while now that it's time for me to start dating again. Maryah broke up with me in March. Went out to dinner with her when I got back. She told me that she's going out with somebody from her church now. Actually it's the brother of the really cool freshman helper at the retreat. I'm hoping that doesn't impair my relationship with him. I know Nathan is a cool guy, and I don't think I bear any ill will towards his bro, but that's all in my head. It's still taking a while for my heart to catch up. Oh well. I think this is long enough for my first post. Maybe I'll play around with the other settings. Perhaps go out and meet some new people. Adios for now.

About Me

My wife thinks I'm awesome. Counter

Days since Dan entered into wedded bliss:

::Required Reading::
My beautiful wife
The Slot
A Capital Idea
eegah, eliot!
Practicing Myrtle
Obscure Store
The Plug


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